Hey, watch your heart-titude!

Are you interested in living in a sublime mansion for an investment of as little as one hour of your time each week?

Sounds like the saccharine sweet promise of a late night real-estate infomercial. But alas leave it to the Buddhists to come through on the deal. They’ve named your body – yes your body - as one of the best places to live in the world, make that the universe.

So how do you go about movin’ on up?

Our resident yoga-book-club introduced us to the national best-seller, Awakening the Buddha Within, by Lamas Surya Das. Well worth your read—superbly written, light on dogma and chock full of sensible practices. In the chapter on right effort, the author suggests you can build a marvelous internal living space by focusing on the four heart-titudes, otherwise known as divine abodes (or homes):

       1. Loving kindness and friendliness
       2. Compassion and empathy
       3. Joy and rejoicing
       4. Equanimity and peace of mind

Turns out we are no strangers to the four heart-titudes. (…and you know how much I love connecting the dots, no matter how Rorschach-ink-blot loose the association!) Who knew, but the four heart-titudes correlate to the Tibetan prayer recited from time to time during our opening meditation; Sally Kempton gifts it at the beginning of each of her meditation tele-sessions. Give it a try. When read with sincerity, it can melt the moment and begin to clear away the internal clutter.

May all beings have happiness and the causes of happiness
May all beings be free of suffering and the causes of suffering
May they know the scared joy that that arises in the space beyond suffering
May they rest in equanimity that knows no grasping or hatred
May they experience the equality of all beings
May my practice be of benefit to all

And so…we similarly used our physical yoga asana practice to spruce up our inner mansions. You did a lot of heart-openers (back bends) and in the spirit of a practice that benefits all, you helped each other into handstand. No yogi was left behind. You infused each pose with whichever heart-titude struck your fancy–-you made joy, compassion, friendliness etc. right there on your mat.

Stop searching and start making.

You proved to yourself that through practice you can "make" so much of what you are searching for. Any time, any where, therein lays the latent potential of tuning in and dialing-up a heart-titude.

Granted, it is not always easy or even clinically possible for some of us to draw out joy or empathy on demand. We’ve all had days maybe even weeks, months, or years where ‘fake it until you make it’ has been our only option. And yet, more often than not I’ve seen a wide variety of people turn into magicians on their yoga mats. Instead of pulling rabbits out of hats – poof! – in 90 minutes or less they’re spinning heart-titudes seemingly out of thin air.

Just do it.

Now, some of you suggested (smiling): Buddhism equals new-agey equals skeptical. Fair enough. You do not attend a public yoga class looking to practice a new (another) religion. Reading a book about Buddhism, let alone practicing it, is not your thing. You are not believers rather you are practical. You simply want to feel good, be better. If an eastern inspired (or best said any practice) works, enhances your life here and now –helps you to be a good parent, employee, child, leader, friend, lover, etc... you’re in.

So we welcomed your inner skeptic as the author suggested. We took off the table whether or not we “believed” in Buddhist concepts such as reincarnation or Bodhisattva status. And instead we put the Buddhist heart-titude practice up to your “does it work and is it useful” test. As an example we contemplated what would happen if we did not build space (a room) within ourselves furnished with loving-kindness and forgiveness. Our conclusion…

Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head. – Esther Lederer

Yep, count most of you in (…especially the capitalists in class ;) Seems most everyone had a few pesky tenants in need of an eviction.

How do the practices work?

It’s complicated.

And the more I learn the less I know (…rats!) What I’ve come to appreciate however is that there are many ways to describe the mystery of our experiences and each of us has a preferred vernacular. For some it is science, others philosophy, art, poetry, architecture, and the list goes on and on. Yet while each of us may prefer a particular language, the basic themes are so often similar. It is with this in mind that I shared the scientific explanations of heart oriented practices below not as proof per se but rather to offer “one” way to describe my experience and maybe yours too.

• How God Changes Your Brain is a book by Dr. Andrew Newberg, a professor of neuro-theology. In it he explains how the anterior cingulate cortex connects the rational (mind) and emotional (heart) parts of the brain. The cortex is activated when you mediate on heart-titudes like love, joy, or hope thereby increasing the communication between the heart and mind parts of the brain. Pretty cool. The result is more empathy for yourself and others, key ingredients for a meaningful life. (www.andrewnewberg.com)

Interestingly (...here I go loosely connecting the dots again) long ago and far away the Indian language of Sanskrit used the word manasika to name the heart|mind. One word. Not two. Intuitive. Not scientific. Lends some merit to the adage, trust first then verify...even if it takes science eons to catch up with what your heart already knows.

• Heart Math is an organization dedicated to the scientific study of the heart mind connection. They have all kinds of info about their research on their site. The video below talks about the science behind how cultivating a positive heart-titude affects both you and those around you.



It's complicated....but then again, maybe it's not.

Because...in the end all that may matter is simply your experience. Think a about it. Right. Wrong. Science. Religion. And everything in between. How did you experience the world? Truth be told, I approach all of these yoga-related philosophies and practices, not from a vantage point of right or wrong, how far out or intellectually pristine, but rather how may this enhance my here and now (...and duly noted a certain legal beagle philosopher vehemently disagrees with my paradigm!)

So what my experience tells me is that whether a Buddhist teaching or not, when I create positive feelings and wish them for others my life is better. And whether the frequency of my heart||mind connection is oscillating at an optimal rate or not, your yoga practice makes me better. Truly, it does. I have entered our yoga class once too often exhausted or heart broken by the toils of life. Yet when you get busy radiating friendliness or joy on your mats in class, it rubs off. I feel it. You change my inner state. Your yoga practice matters. You matter. And perhaps this was the only point that needed to be made.

Closing…

We spent the last few moments of our practice in silence putting the finishing touches on the beautiful mansion we built within the cave of our own hearts by focusing on the four heart-titudes and wishing them for others.

During our meditation I was reminded of St Peter's apse at the Vatican. I’m not particularly religious nor Catholic. Yet, in all my travels this sanctuary of the divine continues to be one of the best outward manifestation of what I imagine the home sweet home of my heart may look like after meditating or practicing asana intent on the four heart-titudes. Awe inspiring. Decadent. Scintillating. A prism of hope and peace swaddled in angelic light.

So my wish for each of you as we left our yoga mats was that this practice gave you a heart-titude (versus attitude) adjustment! And you opened to the possibility that you have all that you need to build a home sweet home of your dreams within the cave of your heart, an expansive palace beyond religion, language or science, where you can go at any time to be cradled in unconditional acceptance and forgiveness, freed to give more and (perhaps...even more challenging) to receive more love, compassion, joy and peace.

To building a sublime mansion befit for Architectural Digest within the cave of your heart, Namaste!

Skinny Dipping: When not having a plan is the plan

Anu bhavana (with becoming): being with your direct experience as things come together, copulate, transmute (i.e. heat, light, color) or coalesce the senses.

Sometimes I like to teach yoga naked…“themeless” that is;) As you might imagine, flashing a class can be daunting, especially for a compulsive theme-addict like myself. I admit it. I like to have a plan. Really, is that so bad? Planning does work well most of the time. So, why then step out and expose myself?

Well, maybe you can relate. You prepare. You study. You edit. You hold back until you know just one more fact, find just the right time/person(s) or learn one more technique. In your quest for perfection, amid a cacophony of relentless self monitoring and theorizing, you one day awake to find you are the “who” standing in your own way. Analysis paralysis. You haven’t perfected a darn thing. And all the while, tick-tock, possibility after possibility passes you by.

Or, perhaps you do act, even brilliantly but on auto pilot. I’ve noticed this as I’ve watched some business leaders or top athletes. Flawless. Buttoned up. Measured. Practiced. They’ve got an answer for everything. Yet they don’t risk much and they don’t give/get much either. Knock-knock, anybody in there? All technique. No heart.

So every now and again I leave my notebook (a.k.a. security binky) at home. No plan. No theme (…gasp). You pick your favorite asanas and together we co-create our class letting a theme emerge (or not.) We practice opening to whatever is being offered right then and there, letting go, trusting, playing and even making a mess on our mats.

In other words, we practice making mud balls. In the delightfully fun book Life is a Verb Patti Digh wrote a chapter entitled polish your mud balls. (note: I tried to weave the excerpt I read aloud into this post:) In it she shares a metaphor about pottery students who were graded an A for either quantity (50 lbs of pots) or quality (one perfect pot.) Which group do you think produced the highest quality pots? You guessed it, the group tasked with quantity. Instead of hypothesizing, they jumped in and submersed themselves in that wonderfully meditative current of direct experience (anu bhavana), churning out piles of work and continuously learning from their mistakes.

So what happens in a yoga class when not having a plan is the plan?

• Sometimes not much. No theme emerges. It's just one more pot (class.)

• Other times a pot (theme) beyond your wildest imagination appears.

Dare I put in writing, cow butt, which has snuck its way into becoming our class moniker for the expanding spiral of the upper inner thighs that blossoms your toosh. When I suggested to the terrific women of Wisconsin, “stick out your booty like J.Lo.” they responded, “Oh, you mean like a cow?” Well ok, yes, that works too, like a cow. The rest is history. This theme has taken on a life of its own!

• And then when you least expect it out comes the perfect pot.

In one class as we moved from Robin’s favorite pose of squat (malasana) to Tom’s perennial pick crow (bakasana) into another side arm balance...voila! The perfect theme surfaced: love is stronger than fear.

Arm balances are great teachers. All too often we let fear take the lead as we enter the pose. It riddles our hands with uncertainty, makes us doubt and look outside of ourselves for confirmation, or already has us conjuring up an escape plan before we’ve even started.

Similarly from time to time off our mats we may (well) freak-out when faced with circumstances that rattle us, wake us up, expose our insecurities, whether it’s dating, trying a new hobby, love or ever changing job responsibilities.

When fear is in charge, someone always gets hurt.

So as an alternative you practiced leaning into the uncertainty of an arm balance with love not fear. You confidently placed your hands on the mat, stayed true to yourself with honest alignment, and found chaturaunga (low push up), a pose you’ve worked on and perfected. Next you softened your heart and unabashedly let the energy flow. It truly was awesome to watch. If your legs took flight, fantastic…if not, who cared, you were practicing something much more useful off the mat, trusting yourself to whole heartedly align with the current streaming through you and open to the here and now.

What happened when you applied our spontaneous theme to handstand?

Progress and high fives. Instead of kicking up with a crazy leg flailing with fear you infused it with your love for anything from ice cream to your children. And WOOO-HOOO, Barbara kicked up into handstand without any assistance, something she has been working on for years!! Yea!

In closing...

Dive into the fullness of the moment with a heroic heart (vikrama).

Make a choice. Doing nothing is doing something. The opening of the Bhagavad Gita is a good reminder of this centuries old quandary. Lord Krishna asks the warrior Arjuna to consider whether or not he is breaking the promise of yoga by not taking the action of stepping onto the battle field. The field he faced was filled with contradictions, obstacles and no possibility of a perfect outcome; his family members were on the opposing side.

At some point all of us must step onto a similar playing field– whether the starting line of a race, a stage, a board room, or hovering over your phone as you’re about to send “that” text - any moment where you find yourself standing naked at the midline between your deepest vulnerabilities and greatest triumphs, between the agony of heart break and the thrill of fulfilling your deepest desire.

And so we practiced on our mats, not just the diving but also the swimming that follows. We sought out that moment after you jump when you realize omg, now what? You are out in the open and vulnerable. Do you grab a fig leaf for cover? Allow yourself to be paralyzed by the possibility of failure? Or do you lean forward into that current (anu bhavana) where things come together, transmute and coalesce and instead ride the wave that’s right there in the moment? Love the rhythm. Honor it. Welcome the people who enter the flow. Cracks and all. And instead of perfection, splash, fiddle around, revel in the ambiguity.

My wish for each of you as we left our mats was that you take the risk of exposing yourself (figuratively and legally, of course!) and then in the moments that follow, you trust. You have done the hard work. I see it each week when you practice on your mat. You already have all that you need. And you don’t have to go anywhere, the time is always now. This current is forever flowing. You do not need to wait for the perfect confluence of events for a little skinny dipping.

To co participating versus orchestrating, to aligning rather than designing and above all to trusting that love is stronger than fear, Namaste!

P.S. In a blog post about spontaneous themes and baring it all, I’d be remiss if I did not mention one of the best observations ever. Sue noted, “Ed is going strapless to show off his back cleavage in mer-man!” Guess I’m not the only one who likes to go rogue on the mat.

CEO CEO CEO

Do you know a Jack(ie) Welch?

She oversees a complex set of finances and even with razor thin budgets, never misses Plan. When there is a large home improvement project she relentlessly brands the overall vision with the contractors and much to their dismay is a shrewd negotiator. She handles highly matrixed household logistics with ease. And I’m pretty sure she’s gone so far as to set annual performance objectives for the person who cleans her home, as she thoughtfully weighs the pros/cons of a job elimination. When asked what keeps her up at night, she’ll tell you she worries most that she is not doing enough to create an environment where her children feel safe to be creative and take risks amid the pressures of an increasingly competitive world.

No doubt, she is a Chief Executive Officer (CEO).

But then again, we concluded, aren’t we all CEOs? At the very least of our own lives, and then as leaders of companies, teams, class rooms, families, book clubs, bands, etc.

This class was inspired by an article in Forbes magazine entitled, “Yoga Made Me a Better CEO”. The opening quote of the article: “Blessed are the flexible for they will not be bent out of shape.” So we in turn practiced being CEOs on our mats.

Executive Summary

• Accept the CEO role, pour your heart into it (*)
• Set your intention
• Unwavering focus on mission v.s. short term gains
• None of us alone is as good as all of us together
• Inspire a shared purpose
• Strive for continuous improvement
• Push to try things you never imagined
• Yet manage the risk, you’re not a renegade, always have a plan B
• Use yoga to reorient your outlook on life, renew your sense of play
• Have fun!

Examples

I. Are you artificially inflating your short term stock price at the expense of long term gains?

In Virabhadrasana (Warrior) I, we practiced steadfastly infusing your back leg with your “mission” statement. Using the see saw principle, the shins of your back leg moved in (down) so that your thighs moved out (up.) Now the hard part, as you kept your back leg straight (true to your “mission”), you bent your front knee directly over your ankle angling toward your 4th/5th toes, and resisted the temptation to bend your front knee so much to "get" the pose(a.k.a short term inflation of your stock price) at the expense of buckling your back leg (a.k.a. compromise your long term “mission”.) While you may not have gone as far in the short term, trust me, this alignment was better for the long term health of your hips and knees (a.k.a your "company".)

II. Test your limits, take risks to go farther than you did before. Yet always have a plan B.

We challenged ourselves to (3) consecutive urdhva dhanurasana (back bends.) However, just like a CEO has business continuity (BCP) plans, we also had a plan B on our mats, whether setting up blocks on a diagonal at the wall, entering into joint ventures to use another’s ankles or staying with bridge pose.

Now...I’m not so sure about the CEOs who suggested their “mission” statements called for going to lunch after the first urdhva “d”;)

III. Create a culture which inspires inclusion and a shared purpose. We're better together.

We used eka pada rajakapotasana prep (pigeon) to test the culture created by our inside voice when the stakes were raised and the pressure mounted. To set up our organization structure, we held our “mission” in the core of the belly to inspire security and inclusion and then created the space needed for collaboration to flourish by taking the sides of the waist back without constricting the environment (collapsing the hips.) After several minutes, when the intensity began to build, you answered for yourself whether your internal words that ultimately create culture were admonishing or uplifting? As a CEO under duress did you take full accountability or project it onto someone else, like me? (I know, I take class too!)

In closing…

Simply stated, yoga makes all of us better.

To stepping fully into the role of CEO in all that you do both on and off your mat, namaste!

(*) After class I was reminded that Starbuck’s CEO Howard Schultz’s first book is similarly titled, “Pour Your Heart Into It: How Starbucks Built a Company One Cup at a Time.”

Link to the article: http://www.forbes.com/2011/03/25/yoga-meditation-better-ceo-leadership-managing-kawer.html

Love Muffins

Prasad: food, soulful offering with the intent to nourish someone else

Here is the recipe we perfected for baking ourselves into love muffins on our mats.

Ingredients

1 c. precision, too much or too little can ruin the whole batch
2 c. solid foundation, a finely crafted baking pan
3 c. melted heart, tips of scapula united
4 c. deep intention to create a delectable gift for someone else

For best results use only the finest all natural organic ingredients. (From what I see each week, definitely not a problem!)

Tips

• Muffins are not cake, the batter is meant to be a little lumpy! Over-mixing can lead to dense, tough muffins.
• Adding your special unique spice(s) makes all the difference.

Method

No preheating required. Instead of baking at 350 degrees, in each asana, simply let yourself be seen by the ultimate baker, that essence which knows your name. It's comforting, encircles and holds you, from the floor to the ceiling to far beyond, unwavering in its desire to treat you to a delicious experience. And, no matter what, it will not let you down (said otherwise, let your muffin tops flop). Think about it—this essense is holding together even the tiniest of atoms in the most rock solid of objects. Whipping up a batch of love muffins is nothing, all in a days work.

Serving Suggestions

Serve love muffins with the soulfulness of pranam, bowing (i.e. in balasana, child's pose) in honor of the magnificence of something bigger than yourself, as if to say, "here look, I’ve truly done my very best to create this gift (love muffin) for you."

Nutrition

Heart healthy, unlimited source of sri

99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall, 99 Bottles of Beer…

Take one down, pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall…

Who says mantras must only be in Sanskrit? Chanting this classic road trip song during class might not have been as sonically effective as om namah shivya but it sure would have been fun. I’m still smiling thinking about a passerby peeking into the studio as we flowed through our asanas belting out a count down to ‘one bottle of beer on the wall, one bottle of beer…’ until we stumbled into svasana.

Why all this talk about beer and yoga this week? I was inspired by a story about a Thai Buddhist temple in the province of Sisaket which– get this – was constructed using one million beer bottles! Yes, one million beer bottles. Check out a few more pics and link to the article below.

There is not much a change in perspective can’t transform into a good thing.

What intrigued me most about the temple is the blatant reminder that all of us have a tremendous amount of choice in how we see the world in which we live. Really, we do. And the next time you doubt it, recall the Buddhist beer temple!

The Buddhist monks could have turned away from the environmental waste which littered their town or expressed disgust for an enabler of addiction like alcohol.

Instead they chose to make art out of the mundane—to take the trash, waste, tempting vices, and sit with them, engage them head on, ultimately using them to build a sacred (optimally aligned) place.

And we can too. Making art out of our, at times humdrum, lives does not have to mean we take more trips to MoMA or the ballet, but rather cultivate our ability to more deeply appreciate the state/world we are in, whether standing in line at Target or on an exotic vacation.

So this week on our mats we practiced having a kaleidoscopic perspective, one that opens us up to possibilities…without drinking a few beers! Sorry to disappoint, but our practice is at 8:30AM. We placed particular attention on being receptive versus passive, and playing with the following:

• Invoke the always present rasa (taste) of shanta (peace)
• Move to the boundary of certainty
• Flex your thinking at the mid-line, uber-receptive to the possibilities
• Welcome the uncertainty

In keeping with indulging a libations theme, while in malasana (squat), I shared a quote:

Happiness is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel it’s warmth.

And so we quickly digressed into some male encoded humor. You responded with your own favorite drinking related jokes, the only one I recollect had something to do with dunalp beer, and bellies that dunlap over your belt. Who says yoga class has to be serious:)

In closing...

My wish for you as we left our mats was that the Buddhist beer temple serves as a reminder that you can choose to make art out of the everyday. The monks chose to celebrate and make art of the world they live in, exactly as it is, with all of its perfect imperfections. So when you too find yourself at the boundary of certainty, just like we practiced our our mats this week, consider opening to the peace and calm (shanta) which is never father than your next breathe and welcome in the uncertainty, the alternative view point, the art. And the best side effect (hangover, if you will)...

...when you change the way you look at things the things you look at change.

Om shanti!

P.S Here is a link to the full article: http://greenupgrader.com/4262/one-million-beer-bottles-later-and-its-a-buddhist-temple/2/

Friend Request

Kalyana-mitra: auspicious friend(s) whom we choose to share a mutually worthwhile passage.

Time magazine named Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg their 2010 Person of the Year. Seemed everywhere we turned as we crossed the threshold into 2011 we were nibbled on by sound bites about his life, the movie Social Network, or the awe inspiring rise of Facebook. In just seven years, Facebook is approaching 600 million users, which is about one in every dozen people on the planet! The social entity is now two times as large as the population of the U.S. and 70% of the users are outside of the U.S.

Holy cow, we crave connection!

I first pulled together this now vintage 2009 class theme when the concept of Facebook was new to me and the US was at the height of the recession. At that time Deepak Chopra had suggested in an email newsletter to focus on deepening your relationships versus acquiring things.

So it seems finding and managing the delicate balance of meaningful relationship is a perennial pursuit. Just like on our yoga mats, we don’t “get” balance once and for all, we work and play at it always.

During the opening centering, I recalled a Tibetan Buddhist prayer often recited at the start of meditation which, in short, is a wish for all beings to have happiness, be free from suffering, and that your seemingly invisible practice be of benefit to all. There is a sweet presumption inherent in both this prayer from long ago and far away and the Facebook of our times—we are never alone, we are always in relationship.

The Time article touched on the many ways the rise of social networking is pushing us to think differently about relationship—virtual vs. the power of human touch or full fish-bowl like disclosure of all aspects of yourself vs. the extraordinary gift of intimacy—the bottom line, regardless of medium or how open/closed the boundary, we need each other to see ourselves more clearly.

And these relationships (reflections) matter. A recent study concluded relationships are a key health factor right up there with diet and exercise (no surprise). One outcome of the study that really stuck with me is that negativity rules. A single negative relationship has a stronger impact on health than a positive one. In fact it takes 7.2 positive relationships to compensate for 1 negative relationship. Goes to show there is wisdom in the saying, good fences make good neighbors. Be sure to choose and manage your networks with care!

Yet, with all of this connectivity, don't you think there continues to be way too much loneliness? I passed along to you a suggestion that was once shared with me—you are never alone on your yoga mat, no matter how far away from home or you feel in your own skin.

I liken it to passing by your PC or smart phone, knowing that your Facebook friend network is always there, with something to share or eager to listen to your contribution, the only difference is that with technology today you can actually see your Facebook network with a click of a button.

It may take a while longer for most of us to advance to this (spooky) level of clairvoyance while alone on our mats; which is probably a-OK given some of you in class in turn broke out into Rockwell's ‘80s hit song “It always feels like…somebody’s watching me”. Not only was that very funny, but rest assured definitely yes…you bet we will all be there whispering, “head of the arm bones back, top of the shin forward, small micro bend in the knee, put your head between your ears ;)”

Maintaining our social network is a process. Be as flexible...

For fun, we simulated a flexible social networking process in Parsvokanasana (standing side angle bend) using the Anusara universal principles of alignment. First, open to the possibility that just about any friend request holds the possibility of genuine friendship. Accept the invitation. As you engage in the process, sometimes you’ll be the primary contributor (organic energy), and then when you let’s say cross the mid line into being a serial Facebook poster of your every action to thousands of your closest friends(narcissism), no worries, you’ll pull back, tighten the boundary (muscular energy). Other times you’ll be the steadfast listener/spectator (outer spiral), but when you become so contracted you’re not posting or commenting at all (voyeurism), you’ll loosen up and offer back your unique voice (inner spiral).

...as you are strong.

Whether social networks or the meaning of words, when we look more closely, there is always more. Kalyanam is translated as celebration of relationship, marriage. Mitra means friend or ally; but it also means the sun, the most reliable source of companionship, which gives without asking for no other reason than it can wanting nothing in return—an act of pure unadulterated grace.

I’d venture to guess all of us want companionship that gives without asking anything in return, but may find it difficult from time to time to be an unwavering ally when our friends (or ourselves) act of out of fear or lead with their insecurities.

So today on our mats we also practiced being a reliable friend. Proving to ourselves we have what it takes to be that (1) positive relationship and if needed can give up to (7) times more to help counter our friends' (1) negative relationship.

In preparation for handstand, we partnered up, stood on the side of the leg our friend planned to kick up with and gave an unyielding “mitra” like hold to the inner edge of their ankle. Your friend pressed their leg into the mid line of your reliable assist and low and behold up they went. While your friend’s legs may have been fearfully flailing, or perhaps he littered you with all sorts of insecure excuses as to why he would not go up—each of you stood firm, you did not waver, and you gave without asking anything in return (except maybe not to be kicked.)

Now the true test will be whether or not we get this "mitra" hold right when we are off of our mats in our offices, cars, bedrooms...

In closing...

Let an angel swing and make you swoon, as suggested by the lyrics of the song The Riddle which was played during Svasana. Said otherwise, indulge in the gift of relationship, first and foremost with yourself and then in all of its infinitely creative and at times challenging forms with others. My wish for each of you as we left our mats was best summed up by the following:

A Blessing for Friendship by John O'Donohue
May you be blessed with good friends,
And learn to be a good friend to yourself,
Journeying to that place in your soul where
There is love, warmth, and feeling.
May this change you.
May it transfigure what is negative, distant,
Or cold within your heart.
May you be brought into real passion, kindness,
And belonging.
May you treasure your friends.
May you be good to them, be there for them
And receive all the challenges, truth, and light you need.
May you never be isolated but know the embrace
Of your anam cara.
("anam cara" means soul friend in the Celtic world)

With much sincerity and gratitude, thank you, thank you for sharing your practice with me each week. And to each and every one of us knowing our kalanya-mitra in this lifetime, Namaste!

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What’s your story?

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” - Talmud

We all have a story.

On our mats, I’d bet each of us has at least one persistent storyline about our limitations—why we can’t perform a certain asana or perhaps tales of old injuries that we never want to risk exposing ourselves to again (ever). I shared with you my old "drop back” narrative: it’s only an asana, who cares in the big scheme of things, everybody has at least one pose they don’t do, so this will be mine, no way I'm trying it in public, surely I'll hurt or embarrass myself...

“If an idiot tells you the same story every day for a year, you would end up believing it”.

Need I say more about my internal blather?

The most important story we will ever tell about ourselves is the story our inside voice tells to our self. The good news, we are both the author and the hero; heroes are never ordinary. But, even heroes can get stuck from time to time, stop listening, and succumb to complacency. Our stories, similar to the consequences of neglecting our bodies, can suffer from an unhealthy hardening of categories and calcification of perceptions.

So our practice this week focused on listening to the tales we tell ourselves on our mats. To help confront our stories, we performed most of our regular asanas with an element of asymmetry. In short, whether a story or an asana, difference helps us find connection.

Example: Is your story that there is only one way to perform bhujangasana (cobra) or pincha mayurasana (fore arm balance)? What does your internal narrator have to say when you’re invited to change it up, place one hand palm down, put the other on finger tips and twist (goofy style)? Are you open to the change? Or, did you have to confront that inside voice who told you how it was and always will be?

In much the same way, our bodies also respond to being challenged, taken off center, by the new and different, right juxtaposed versus coordinated with the left, hence cross training, or (so they tell me) the reason for those mysterious Bosu balls. You never know your core strength more than when something tries to knock you off center.

And...it's worth mentioning other bylines you offered up:
• Chaturanga dandasana (low push up)…is a short story, or
• Eka pada koundinyasana II (arm balance)…is a fantasy, 30 year epic!

“Be careful how you interpret the world, it is like that.”

Let’s be honest, we don’t just tell stories to ourselves on our mats. We also tell them about work, health, happiness, and family. I was fortunate to attend a seminar by Jim Loehr, a sport and leadership psychologist and author of “The Power or Story”, who encouraged us to first write our old stories on these topics and then compose our new stories. You should definitely try this! I found my old story included some egregiously flawed logic.

As class drew to a close, our last asana was matsyasana (fish) pose, where I suggested a fish spends its entire life in water without knowing it. In other words, once a story inculcates us, it can be difficult to change, because it becomes who we are, the world in which we live. [And duly noted, it’s debatable whether or not a fish knows it’s in water:) How could I really know? Thank you for suspending your scientific inquiry and indulging me to make a point! ]

Finally, we practiced "Talking back to your mind, to change your story (samskaras)meditation."

As you you sit for meditation, listen to that inside voice, and witness the thoughts as they pass by. If a passing thought is negative, painful, or blaming, then take control of the story and substitute it with a positive, loving or empowering thought. You shift the story, but not in a false, or unauthentic way. So for instance only substitute an angry thought with forgiveness, if you mean it. If not, then perhaps an angry story line is replaced with a reminder that “I have what I need to deal with this”, “There is another way of looking at this”, “This will pass” or “My intention is that this situation unfolds for the highest good.”

Our stories are meant to be told.

To be human, is to have a story to tell. As we remember and retell our stories and create new ones we become the authors, the authorities of our own lives. The script is being written, played, whether we are conscious about it or not. My wish for each of you as we left our mats, was that you accept the invitation to co participate in its telling. Whether etched in the corners of your mind or better yet you take pen to paper, write your story, to remember, to learn, to determine who and what you are, and who at what you yearn to be. All in all, it is the story of ourselves and of each other which we keep in our hearts…that makes us who we are.

The whisper of the breathe asks, “Who are you?” To which the internal narrator responds, “I am the story of myself.”

To a blockbuster, NY times best selling, Pulitzer Prize National Book Award winning story, Namaste!

P.S. After class, Connie recommended we read: Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann. Excellent suggestion, thank you!